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Good friends vs toxic friends (and triangulation)

Wednesday, January 10, 2024

Relationship Weekly /Relationship /Good friends vs toxic friends (and triangulation)

When you struggle in your relationship life, who do you reach out to?


And what is the tone of your reach out?

Do you ask for help?
Do you get them to join your “story” or side?
Do you talk about the other person in a way that is blamey toward them (or you?)?
Do you throw them under the bus?

Or do you challenge them with statements like this:

What is your part?
Help me see my side
What is really getting triggered in me that I need to deal with?

In my latest YouTube video, I discuss all of these. I show what a good friend sounds like and what a “bad” friend sounds like.

I demonstrate the difference between both so you can actually see examples of what to say and what not to say.

I also briefly discuss drama triangles (something we cover extensively in Relationship Mastery and in my book).

And, finally, I show another example of my wife and I repairing so you can see what repair might sound like after you blame someone for your relationship problems.

A good, deep friendship is someone who challenges us and supports us. They take a stand that we are not a victim and that they have our back in overcoming whatever challenges we’re facing.

Stop tolerating friends who collude with the smaller version of yourself.

While you are watching the YT video, you can do me a big favor and leave a comment, subscribe to my channel and watch the video all the way through.

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Hi, I Am Jayson Gaddis

Founder of the Relationship School

I am an artist, best selling author, podcaster, speaker, coach, CEO, founder, human behavior specialist and relationship expert. I am the creator of Interpersonal Intelligence® and Present Centered Relationship Coaching® and have trained over hundreds of coaches in 11 countries. My book Getting to Zero: How to work Through Conflict In Your High Stakes Relationships was #2 on the Wall Street Journal best seller list and was voted Editors Choice, Best non-fiction, and Best Leadership and Business book in 2021 on Amazon. I’ve been married to my amazing wife since 2007 and have two beautiful kids. We live in Boulder, Colorado. When I don’t live and breathe this relationship stuff with my family, I pretty much get my ass handed to me.

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Relationship Mastery Membership Program

Our signature program aims to enhance communication, create secure relationships, and deepen self-acceptance. Relationship Mastery is an 18-class program that leads you on a journey of personal transformation. Master communication skills, establish secure relationships, and gain self-acceptance through this relationship training.​

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